she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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