After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
His nipple licking is glorious
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