fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
