carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
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