Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
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