tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
