White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
