Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
im holly from the hills drunk
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
They are going to name an STD after you.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
