I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
