The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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