I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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