4 words: hood of his car
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
