Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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