My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
