yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
