Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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