yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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