giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
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