Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
