need another drink. this is the easiest way
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
