We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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