just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
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