so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
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