At least make sure they are 18
Why
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Randomize
