butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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