we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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