Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Randomize
