She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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