I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
