So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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