everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
