She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Randomize
