I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
