I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
