these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
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