I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Randomize
