so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
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