A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
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