I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
