I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
