yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
