i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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