the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
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