someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
