He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
You left your phone here
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