I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
