I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize
