CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
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