Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Randomize
