Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
